Excessive

I've had trouble finding my way to the computer to write lately, and as I always say, it makes me feel bad, and I regret it and I want to fix it.

I've been working full time, as has Bekki, so it doesn't leave a lot of time, and when I am at home, at if Bekki is home, I generally spend the night with her, as much as I can, and rarely do I have a night to myself (usually only weekends). When I do have the night to myself, I can sometimes remember to write something, like right now... Bekki is working a brutal day at work, a splt: 11-4:30, then 5:30 to midnight or later.

I personally worked from 7am to 4:30pm, drove home with Bekki and picked up some Wendy's, then she dropped me off, turned around and went right back to work. I felt really bad, pretty guilty that I got to be at home and she had to go back, and I don't know why... it wasn't my choice, but I still felt bad. I could've stayed and worked... it was a nightmarish day with four plated dinners, and there was a lot to do, and I stayed an hour and a half late without asking, but I couldn't pass up the ride home. Tomorrow is also going to be busy but hopefully it goes quickly.

Bekki and I have recently opened some joint bank accounts to manage both our long term saving goals, and our day to day expenditures, like buying food, paying bills, etc. Right now we keep track of everything we ever spend that should be split, I then enter the data into a program I wrote, manually manage other receipts, and at the end of the month I have a spreadsheet that says how much Bekki owes me or how much I owe her, so that on the first of the month we're even. To get around all of that work, we simply have a joint account and each pay cheque (so bi-weekly) we deposit a set amount of money calculated by our budget, and we simply use that account to buy anything that should be split, so I have less to keep track of. All I have to keep track of now is how much we've each deposited, to ensure we've deposited our assigned amounts.

I'm pretty serious about trying to make a lot of money right now because going to school and never working last semester has really put me in the poor house, so I really want to make some money now, save up a bit, buy a few things... it feels good and I'm determined. I think Bekki is as well... we've been thinking a lot about money, and it's got me (and us I think) hopeful about the future, and makes being at work, especially when we're both there (ie. one isn't at home waiting for the other) a lot more bearable and it gives it a purpose.

I still need to relax though, and I've been playing a bit of Torchlight 2, from the creators of Diablo 1 and 2, and it's pretty fun so far. Could use a few more classes if you ask me, but I've yet to play any but the one Berserker I started, so I really shouldn't complain. I've also been watching Dead Like Me with Bekki, and we recently started Boardwalk Empire (and I started watching the new season on my own).

Work tomorrow is 7am to 3pm, getting a ride with Al both ways I hope, and then Bekki will be at work from 12 to after dinner, so I'll be making a spaghetti dinner I think and trying my best to relax after what will most likely be a stressful day.

Overall I would say that I'm good and have been good, and I love Bekki more than ever, and we're happy and close. Work can be stressful but for the most part I continue to excel.

I'll try to write more. I'm sorry.

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