Excessive

I was originally going to write in one of my books... I was getting ready for a bath and information was starting to leak from my fingerlips in painful spurts and I needed to smear it somewhere, but I couldn't find a book, nor a pen anywhere, so I just burned inscense and death cab for cutie and layed in my scolding bath for a few minutes. It dulled the pain a bit.. but of course it lead to this filth...

Today was a really bad day... I know, I know, don't all my entries start that way? but today was especially shit filled. I didn't get a good sleep, and early in the morning I was woken up about five times to various amounts of screaming, which would automatically put anyone in 'kill mode'. Secondly when I finally got up for work, I was dead tired and felt very upset about something. I was breaking down and I knew it, and I just didn't want to keep going on. I tried calling the doctor for some reason, trying to make an emergency visit, and then trying to make an appointment as soon as possible, and it just ended up with me saying no and hanging up.. apparently doctors only care on specific time sets; which don't include the day of wednesday. After getting fed up with the 'we don't give a shit whats wrong with you' attitude I was getting from the secretary at Dr. Tu's office, I called my Mom crying and just screaming various things like how I can't do it; it being some unattainable goal which may or may not exist. It was at that point where I wanted to curl up in a ball on the living room floor and wish it all away... but I didn't. I got on my fucking shoes and left for work. One of the longest fucking days ever... and I get to do it all over again tomorrow.

The glove compartment isn't accurately named
And everybody knows it.
So i'm proposing a swift orderly change.

Cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all i find are souvenirs from better times
Before the gleam of your taillights fading east
To find yourself a better life.

I was searching for some legal document
As the rain beat down on the hood
When i stumbled upon pictures i tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head

Cause it's too important
To stay the way it's been

There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night

There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night (up all night)
When i'm lying awake at night.

That was Title and Registration by Death Cab For Cutie, and I just really like the first few lines of the song, along with the musical aspect (which you obviously can't hear, but I can certainly send it to you if you email me a request. It's a beautiful but sad song, much like all of his songs... he's such a sad person, and yet he sounds so calm and okay with it all... I wish I was there.

I got Jeffs webspace finally going tonight, as there was an error with the password entry and it had to be reset (so it seems). You can now access his site here: http://traumarecords.webkore.net. Although his website isn't done now, it will be eventually be a haven of beats and porn! So don't hesitate adding that page to your favorites! :) He's a creative guy, so be sure to check out the site because I can guarentee it's going to be very unique, interesting and amusing.

I've been thinking of adding a 'support' section to the site since I find myself always troubleshooting and/or teaching someone something to do with computers, whether it be how to disable startup items or how to use an FTP to create a website, it would be so much easier to just direct people to already created documents that explain it. It's difficult sometimes to come home from 8.5 hours of tech support, to do tech support for another thing... oh, and here's something for the search engines: Stream International sucks MY FUCKING BALL!!!111!!one!

I think I'm blahing up.

768 words

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