Excessive

Today was an aggravating day, where I felt more angry inside than I have in a long time. I think I just woke up in a bad mood, and from the first second I was was at work it just got worse. It's the typical things, at first glance it comes off as everyone at work being lazy, or stupid, or both, but if thought about for a few more seconds, perhaps it's an inability to prioritize, or lack of experience. I don't know what it is, but I'm getting sick of going above and beyond and getting no rewards.

I got to work and did breakfast for over eighty people, which could be considered busy, generally speaking. Anything between eighty and one hundred is busy enough to keep me running food until 10am. That would be enough work for me to stay busy, but I find an event sheet for this lunch at 12pm, with all this random bullshit that nothing is done for, and when I say nothing, I mean literally nothing is done for it. I go and look at the schedule and see that no one is in until 11am, one hour, so it's obvious that I'm responsible for most, if not all, of the preparation of this event, and with a busy breakfast, and multiple breakfast orders, plus orders coming in from suppliers, it really leaves me no time. So I'm texting my bosses, trying to figure out what the fuck is up, telling them that while I will most likely be able to get the majority of the work done by busting my ass non-stop, I probably won't be able to make the scones from scratch in time. So I did manage to get everything done except the scones, and someone came in at 11am and finished that, and things went out on time, but... it was an unnecessarily stressful morning, and to endure that stress (which seems to be an everyday thing now), I really should get a god damn raise.

I decided to say fuck it as far as preparing for the next day, as I'm completely sick of that bullshit, and instead used my last three hours (by this point it was 12pm) preparing the desserts and veg bundles for the wedding, freeing up time (hopefully) for the crew in later in the day to complete prep for the next day. I know deep down that that's not going to happen to any extent that I would be happy with, so at least I know I'm going into a shitshow tomorrow. It's disappointing a little bit that everyone there takes dinner (mainly) and lunch (to a lesser extent) so seriously, and literally think nothing of any breakfasts or brunch. It doesn't go on prep lists, nothing is mentioned, things aren't ordered, or if they are ordered, it was my entire responsibility to remember and say or write something down about it. Why is it my responsibility to make sure brunch is prepared every week? It bothers me... I'm probably one of the lowest paid employees at Windermere, and yet I feel like I have the most responsibility.

I've got a headache... amerh.

After work I made dinner - beef tenderloin. Bekki and I enjoyed dinner while watching Property Brothers, and after dinner she had to get ready to leave for work. As she was leaving, I also got ready to go out and walked to No Frills, as we needed to get some Draino, because our bathroom sink is taking forever to go down and it makes for one disgusting sink. I know it's only a few weeks before we move, but it's got to be dealt with now, and it wouldn't be cool to just leave it like that. The walk to the store was kinda nice, as it had been a long ass time since I've walked anywhere since we have a car now. I enjoyed the walk, listening to Underoath in my headphones loudly... felt good... calming. It was cool out but I was warm in my winter coat and scarf, and I just took my time and enjoyed the fresh air.

Once I was home from the store, I played some Torchlight 2 and watched an episode of Doctor Who (season three Christmas special) but I found myself getting very tired and unable to pay any kind of attention to the game, so I closed it and just finished watching the episode. After it was over, I ran a bath and relaxed while listening to some Morning Stream, so that was nice. Afterwards I moved to the living room, had a snack (mmm, ketchup chips) and turned on Jimmy Fallon. I decided to write, am in the process of finishing Jimmy Fallon, and soon I'm going to lay down to try and sleep, as I work in the morning and my head hurts.

Oh, well... I forgot, before I watched Jimmy Fallon, I read a chapter of The Time Machine by H.G. Wells, which I'm about halfway through now, and it's an enjoyable read, although you can tell it was written in the 1800's.

Tomorrow will... be... a better day? No, it won't. Tomorrow will be equally as frustrating as today was. Bekki works tomorrow at Noon, so I won't have a ride home tomorrow, so I can either... take the bus home on a Sunday (about an hour and a half), I could pay for a cab (about a quarter of the cost of a month of gas... so about a weeks worth of gas), or I could walk home. I'm leaning towards just walking home as I really have nothing else to do and it's less frustrating than taking the bus. I'll bring change just in case, but I'm sure I'll make up my mind based on how tired I am tomorrow after work.

Wish me luck.

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