July 30, 2002 6:07AM
Change is life. Live it.
Well as you all know I've got a very poor almost strangely poor memory so when I'm updating this the fathur I go back in time the less detail I'll be able to provide... now I bet most of you are relieved because you were expecting another fifty page essay about nothing in paticular but not this time! or at least I don't plan on it...
Okay well I don't really remember the 26th at all... honestly so I'm just gonna skip that day. How exciting!
Saturday I had to go to my Dad's house for a goodbye party thing as he's moving to Toronto indefinatly but that wasn't until 7:30 or 8. The day was pretty regular laying around with Linzie and playing shizat on the computing device and whatever. At around 7:00 or so Lindy made supper for Dustin Herself Linzie and I which consisted off corn on the cob and smiles. It was pretty good.. the corn wasn't the best but it wasn't bad either so it was enjoyable.
After supper we went over to Marilyns house just to hang out and so my Mom could have a couple drinks (because Marilyn and her enjoy drinking together not because she's a drunk... because she rarely drinks). It was actually pretty good there I felt comfortable and everything which is rare. Linzie really liked Marilyn too because of her freespiritness and just because she's a very likable person. Marilyn showed us around her house... every room picture peice of dust and so on was shown and explained.. twice! :) No it was fine. Linzie enjoyed herself which made me happy because I wouldn't want her uncomfortable or annoyed.
And now for no reason a picture of Triple H my favorite wrestler:
At around 9:15 or something we left for my Dads place. No one was sure what to expect or anything and even I was hesitant about it but we went anyway because it was a chance to say goodbye and all. I had expected it to be much like most of our other gatherings consisting of dim lights cozy feeling enviroment and just a personal feeling to it but I was wrong dead wrong.
We went up into his house and were met with bright lights rolled joints and a strange feeling in the air... After sitting and talking and introducing Linzie his friend Mike along with two i-wish-i-was-alive-in-the-sixties guys came up and started passing around joints and even thoughtless offered it to Linzie who is quite young (yes she has tried it and whatever but they sure as hell don't know that and them being adults and supposedly responsible at that should have thought about the fact they were passing drugs to a 16 year old who in fact just turned 16). I thought that was pretty strange.
After a few minutes of that I was started to get a headache from the smoke as was Linzie so I had to get out of there and Linzie and I walked to the variety store for Coke and Chips basically for fresh air and so we didn't have to sit around the pot party. There IS a reason I don't go to parties... because that's exactly what they're all like and that's not what I enjoy.
When we got back from the store I decided to sit in the back of the car to eat and drink simply because sitting in a small room filled with smoke didn't seem very intelligent. Eventually I walked back up to the outside of his place in front of a fireplace and just sat. Lindy and Dustin came down shortly after and it was time to go.
I don't know why or what caused it but seeing my Dad there it just didn't seem like my Dad in anyway. He just wasn't the same person who I was previously excited to show off to my girlfriend or who I could just joke around with or show him shit he just seemed different and everything about that night and that place seemed different and it was freaking me out so much that I didn't want to talk to him.
Not to mention I was upset about his leaving. I was fine with it up until that night. I don't know why or what struck me... perhaps it was because he seemed different so it seemed like I had already lost him but the only thing that really upset me was the fact that he wasn't going to be there for me during surgery or whatever comes in the future regarding my tumor. He's been the one who has taken me to the hospital every time I've had to go and we sorta had a connection there as we shared humour while waiting and just hung out during that time and it was great and I sorta figured he'd be the one to see it through with me. but he's leaving so that left too and that's what upset me the most because I was comfortable with the situation but now I'm nervous. I'm nervous enough as it is.
I ended up talking to him a lot before I left though and we managed to fix things and I feel much better about it now as I did earlier but who knows what the future holds. I've never had a father figure really so I won't be missing that at all but him as a friend was great and I may lose that because the opprotunity to hang out and listen to Reel Big Fish or go see a movie or for him to meet my girlfriend (which sucked because I didn't want her to meet my dad while he was drunk and stoned.. I wanted her to meet him when he was being intelligent and funny!) but oh well life is about change and you've got to live with it no point in excessivly complaining about it.
The day after that was equally as strange but in a much different better way. The entire day except a bit in the morning (I'll get to that) we just layed in bed together. Until 8pm or something. It was awesome really awesome. I think we moved only 5 times in the whole day. In the morning around 8 or so it started thundering lightning and pouring out so we decided we should go out and play in the rain. We were going to try it with no shoes this time as last time my shoes were so amazingly wet for days that I didn't feel like repeating that again. So we went out and it was the coldest rain I've felt in the middle of summer. We ran back in and put shoes and socks on sweatshirts and then ran back out. Now it was good. We played in the rain for awhile until we were both soaked to the bone (I even layed down in the puddle just for her) and we made our way back into the house soaking wet. We dried off and changed and then layed down again like I said until 8pm or so when we got up and got something eat and then... dun dun dun layed down again.
After Linzie left at 12:00am we played WarCraft III all night until 6:00am or so and she left and came back over to sleep. She does that now when she doesn't need to babysit. There is nothing better than sleeping and waking up beside the one you love. It just feels really special.
Okay I'm getting really tired of writing and nothing really happened that stands out so I'm just going to sum up today. Linzie came over early we spelt until 6pm and then we just hung out. After she left she went offline and so I played with Ben in WarCraft III until a few minutes ago. Now I'm updating this still no word from Linzie but I'm expecting her in a few minutes.
There. Now I can go eat breakfast and I'll update daily now instead of being lazy that way I won't forget stuff or have to make really really long posts. goodbye.
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Timeline
- I lived with my Mom
- I was with Linzie
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