May 17, 2004 3:35PM
Tired, but not ready
Well I ended up going out last night! It's was lots-o-fun. (yes, no matter what you say, that IS one word, so stfu). (jesus christ, i just ran over my toe with my chair! it's cause i was distracted with kairi entering my room.. i call it the pee-patrol now.). Okay crap, where was i? something about.. going.. out.. i dunno.. new paragraph!!
Last I hung out with Ally and Dave, and sometimes Tim when occasionally stopped his AWESOME dancing! Bought Dave a drink, bought Ally a drink.. bought me a drink. I was like the drink-whore (also one word.. god bless hyphens). (Im hungry.). They played so many songs that I loved last night, I went nuts and started grabbing on to Ally and jumping. Razed in Black - Blush for one, and they played Manson, and they played MSI.. TWICE! and... VNV Nation and way more, it was awesome. Made me wanna dance *wiggles* After it ended, Ally and I went over to Tims to return the skirt Ally borrowed and then we caught a cab back to Allys, which was an adventure in itself. HAH! When we got there, Ally didn't have her key to get in, so we tried calling different numbers, and eventually tried the emergency number, which quite honestly.. wasn't very helpful! They just kinda seemed confused, and then hung up on us. Buuut, once we got inside, Ally and I talked for a bit, I took my sleeping pills, and then we went to sleep. The good part? This time I didn't wake up listening to some womans beach boys music playing. I actually didn't wake up during the night which is a giant bonus, because I sleep much better if that happens. (baaah.. i'm losing the will to write! GAH MARLE!!). In the morning, both Ally and I were still tired or groggy or whatever word is used to describe that 'just waking up' feeling, so we layed in her bed and just enjoyed each others company. It was awesome, as I never get to feel that anymore :) Shortly after, we left for my busstop, and I was on my way home! ooh yes, and when I was getting off the Oxford bus, I totally smashed my head against the top part of the door or cieling or SOMETHING, but I'm short so that didn't make sense, but I screamed really loud, and thought I had cut my head open because it hurt so much. It still hurts to touch :(
When I got home, about fifty million (or five or something) people had added me to their contact lists from Face The Jury.com (which makes a grand total of: 31 in 4 days.. which is kind of frightening in that.. oh-my-fucking-god-what-the-hell-is-going-on kinda way (also one word (holy crap, im like, bracketing inside of brackets inside of brackets! (where will it end!?))). Okay.. for some reason whenever i go to say something small, i manage to make it this really really long run on sentance. what the hells with that?.. maybe I should have put that in brackets... maybe i should have put THAT in brackets.. oh no, i can't stop it.. aaahhh... *explodes*
How bout I try this again? When I got home, I just chatted with a few people.. not very amusing.. read my email, read the pisseria (officially Godly Gods .. my title. bastards stole it), and do other things i generally do a hundered times a day. BUT, eventually Emily (as pictured to the right) came online and alas joy was once again returned to me! And so we talked for.. well, till about 11pm! Aaanyway, I like it. lots.Lets see... I couldn't eat my daily mr. noodles today, for some reason they made me want to throw up half way though, so I stopped.. one of the cats will most likely finish them off for me... or Kairi will pee on them, whichever is fine by me. So, around 9:00, I ordered Swiss Chalet again :D YAY! I ate until I was soo full and sick feeling, but it was sooo worth it because it's like better than sex! As I've said before, it's like the chicken, and the dipping sauce are having sex in my mouth, and the flavour is a result of their love juices spewing around.. wait.. did that get to graphic? I think that got too graphics.. *calms down* sorry. I just get excited about the chicken okay?
I was listening to Silverstein - November a few minutes ago.. i nearly cried.
Now I suppose I'll talk about my traumatic bathing experience. I have this ritual I go through each bath, always. I go under the water, with my nose plugged, face up. Then, I roll over, so I'm face down, still plugging my nose. Then, I hold my breath until it hurts, and then I rush up for air.. and the feeling that follows is unlike any other. It's the most refreshing feeling ever, and my lips start to regain feeling and I dunnoo.. I just do it again, right away. So, after I do that twice.. I usually shave, then wash my hair, then wash myself (too much info?), but this time, when I came up a second time,
and picked up my shaving cream, I couldn't catch my breath. Which I thought, meh, maybe it'll just take me longer since I'm such a giant pansy. So, I shaved, and then.. I still couldn't catch my breath, so I kinda got scared, pulled the plug and decided to get out. I was soo dizzy, and I was gasping for air, and I almost slipped in the tub and fell trying to get out.. and I just quickly dried my hair, threw on my shorts and ran into my room and message Ally for help. I knew I was having a panic attack, but I had never had a panic attack for no reason at all. I started crying and Ally wasn't there at that moment, and I was freaking out cause I was still out of breath, really dizzy and I was starting to black out (reminds me of the dentist), and so I just jumped on my bed, and layed there, on my side, crying, trying to catch my breath. Naturally, Marle came over... she walked up to me, meowed and walked me up and down a few more times.. I was talking to her.. telling her I was scared and stuff.. yes, i have a habit of talking to my cats like they're real people, because they cumminicate back to me.. anyway, I was telling her that I loved her and that I was scared, and she finally just stopped walking up and down my bed, sat down right beside my head, and licked my hand. About two seconds later, I caught my breath. I was still dizzy, but I could breath. So, naturally, I gave Marle a BIG piece of my Swiss Chalet chicken for the help :D hehe, she's so cute. I gave it to her over near my bed, and she took it outta my hands, carried it over to the closet, placed it IN her food bowl, and THEN ate it. She's so sweet to me. I looooooove her.So Michelle might be coming over tomorrow, which is awesome cause I love hanging out with her, and watching bad movies. Well.. 50 First Dates was good dammit! but still.. I hope that works out and she can come, cause otherwise I probably won't be able to chillax with her for another week or so.. cause I'm...
... going to Toronto from Thursday till Sunday! Oohh crazy. Yes, this is Jordan. I AM in fact leaving my room. Why? because I fell asleep awhile ago and woke up as someone else. Might as well give the bastard an interesting life. Anyway, I'm getting a ride up with TFM (thanks to Dave) and chillaxin with them at the show (CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS! BE THERE!). Hey.. tidus just wrote about two paragraphs cause he thought it would be hilarious if he layed on my laptop.. but I deleted it.. it was kinda boring and uninspired.. something about a school for wizards.. i dunno. Anyway, I don't even remember what I was talking about now...
Is there anything left for me to say? I know there is. but.. my mind is blank right now. I should take my sleeping pills and pass out... OOH! told ya! Tidus is eating my Mr. Noodles! GO TIDUS!!
What should you listen to you ask? How about anything buy VNV Nation (Rubicon)? or anything by Covenant (Dead Stars), or Razed in Black (Blush).. ooh ooh, or Assemblage 23 (Naked!)? Yes. Go. do it now.
moew.
I used to make the light shine for you. the sun has left my sky. velvet walls surround my sorrows. I?ve sacrificed my pride. you?re giving up on me. I?ve laid myself to sleep tonight. I know you?ve played out everything in your mind. and now you throw it all away. a shattered memory that you would stay, through thick and thin with me. you?re giving up on me. and when you feel the pain, I?m wishing I could stay. how can I say I love you back, you never made me happy. you?ve laid yourself to sleep, I never said this wouldn?t hurt. you gave up everything; I never said I?d give it back. I know you?ll never change; I won?t be good enough for you. I know, you?ll make it through, I?ll never be around to see.
uh.. thats me....
1612 words
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Timeline
- I lived with Ben on Cartier
- I was with Emily
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