Excessive

I had an accidental vacation; Accidental in that I had three days off at the end of last week (Thur, Fri, Sat) and then I requested Sunday and Tuesday off (suggested, not requested) and Monday was a holiday, so I ended up with Thursday to Tuesday off, and I go back tomorrow. The time off has been a mix of ups and downs, the main negative being a sort of hyper-active mania, where I become unabled to make choices, and my mind races, I can't keep my attention fixed on anything for any amount of time, so instead of relaxing, sitting on the couch and playing a game or two for a few hours, I'll play five minutes of a game, not be able to concentrate or feel relaxed, switch it for some other game that may or may not have popped into my head, and repeat that all day, feeling restless and unsatisfied, feeling insane.

It's weird to think that not that long ago I was pretty much hopeless, with little thought of the future - yeah, I knew I hated my job, being yelled at and disrespected, and I knew I enjoyed programming, so my short term goal was to simply open up a new career path, but that hardly could be called a plan for a future. I had pretty much accepted the fact that I would die alone, and was okay with it, and had no plans for the future beyond continuing on and living my life day by day, enjoying the things I enjoy, and avoiding stress. Things aren't like that anymore. My mind is so full of plans for the future that it's difficult to keep track of it all, I have so many things to do, short term and long term, that I feel like I need to start making a long list so I don't forget some things.

Today wasn't one of those days where I have a lot of interesting things to say, or deep thoughts to explore, 100% of today was work, and just work. I woke up, went to work, just got home 13 hours after I had left, and I've already taken a sleeping pill in order to get ready to sleep, so I can wake up and do it again tomorrow.

Remember when I said I'd write about what's been going on lately tonight? Yeah.. I lied. It's 5:30am and I stayed up all night playing Guitar Hero with Mark, even though I'm really tired, sore, and have a nagging headache. That's dedication.

I'm sweaty, and I'm not even moving, but it's making me tired... tired and blah. After working hard for two days in a row, all I wanted for today was this long, uneventful day of rest and relaxation, where I didn't have to think, or move or do anything and I could just be at peace. Weeeellll not so much.

I did the dishes, and did my best to clean the kitty litter, then cleaned the vacuum, then vacuumed the kitty litter closet, rug, and carpet, took the garbage out twice and then made a giant dinner all by myself, and now I'm gonna have to do the dishes from supper too. Boooooo! That's definitely not lazy.

Michelle wants to watch a movie but I'm antsy and I know that I couldn't sit still for a whole movie, I like being able to switch between playing Super C, Street Fighter, looking online, listening to a podcast, all in five minute intervals. I feel pressured to watch it but screw that noise, I'm gonna do what I want cause I'm a free man! A FUHREEEE MAANNN!!

So there's this mansion up on a hill back in rich town, with it's own private road and private.. god knows what else. Yeah... I work there now. See..