Excessive

I've had a bit of a rougher day than normal, or so it feels at the moment. I've felt above average anxiety, I've felt weak, I've tripped and fell, metaphorically speaking. I had a pizza for dinner tonight, like one from backdoor pizza, and I didn't think I was going to have one for a long time. I kind of feel like I've failed, but I convinced myself it was a reward for wanting it for so long and being strong enough to hold off. I also spent a bunch of money on materials needed to make my own beef jerky, and I feel kind of like a fool now, and I will do it, and see it through, I'm worried it won't turn out properly and I'm just worried.